Perhaps you read my post on Living with In-Laws, and know that my husband and I were excited to eventually have our own space. Well folks, now we have it. We along with our dog live in a 1 bedroom apartment on the South-East side of Austin. The place is pretty close to everything hip and downtownish, but we're now dealing with less than 700 square feet for all our daily living and storage for our hobbies and gear. It's tough. Sometimes it's really hard and I get emotional about it. The balcony (smallest I've ever had or seen) also houses the AC unit, which I think is ridiculous. But along with that are all of my husband's tools and equipment - stuff that would normally be in a garage.
This means there is no room for the tiny space garden I had hoped to install, although I have managed to get one pot out there. Even so, the gorgeous oak tree giving us the much appreciated shade and bursts of green, doesn't let enough sunlight in to grow the things I love about warm climates: tomatoes, melons, Mediterranean herbs, squash, peppers. You know, all that fun summer food. I can however, manage to hang a load of clothes on the drying rack out there when things are somewhat organized. And we opted to participate in a CSA and go to the Farmer's Market more often, since we can't grow our own.
So all of this limited space sometimes makes me really stressed out. My hubby feels like he gave up the possibility of a house with a yard and a garage so he could 'live downtown' (for me, because I don't like the suburbs)...and I just feel cramped. We're both questioning our motives for living in this absurdly tiny place, but it is what it is, and it is what we've got, so I sure as hell had to find a way to make limonade out of it!
How did I do that? Get rid of stuff! Even though all of our belongings fit into a 6x10 trailer which we pulled from Arizona to Texas, it still seems like we have too much! But the getting rid of things process feels AMAZING! I'm not really a big shopper and I don't like to acquire things I don't need...but it's interesting to see how much of what I had, I had convinced myself I needed, and really did not/do not.
Every week I get rid of 5 things. I post some on Craigslist (just got $50 woohoo!), I post some on GearTrade, and some goes to a Goodwill pile. It's sad that we can't have yardsales, because we sure used to love having those yardsale parties. I've had to be extremely discerning. I held onto some things that I thought I could use for some project, and I faced the fact that it was likely a project I would never finish, if I ever began it. So some of the materials I'd been carrying around, they got tossed. Or donated. Or sold.
Busting clutter is good for the soul. It's good for everything. Now the hard thing is figuring out how to tell the people who love me not to buy me things...for birthdays and holidays, I'd much rather have something consumable, like food, or something doable, like go for a hike or festival or something...I usually LOVE the things that people gift to me, but it's difficult to keep it when the things I do have are so intentional and deliberate...
I've created a fun box where I'm saving all the money from what I sell, so that I can have some genuine EXPERIENCES. It could be as simple as going on a day trip, or seeing music (this is Austin, afterall!), or checking out a new coffee house or restaurant. AND, it gets us out of feeling so stuck in tiny space land, into the world, and then feeling better about going home when it's time to settle in for the evening.
I highly recommend you try it. Even if you live in a huge house, get rid of some unnecessary baggage. Don't let the things you own end up owning you! I'm not talking about parting with the things you love and that are dear, just those that make you feel guilty, or annoyed, or just that "I have too much!" feeling. Be honest about it too - ask yourself why you have some thing and be brutally honest about not only your intentions with it, but your reality. Practice the art of not indulging in 'stuff' just because it's on sale, or cute, or you're in one of those moods =) You'll be better for the fun of not buying in long run.
On Love & Judgment in the Facebook Realm
I have one of those love hate relationships with Facebook. Seriously though, it could be an awesome tool for spreading goodness and ideas amongst people connected virtually, increasing unity among beings. Or, it could be a huge tool for corrupt corporations/government/etc to spy on and gather information about regular old people in order to advertise more specifically (gross) or subtly maintain tyrrannical control over anyone who would wish to organize and rebel (grosser). But it is definitely a place where people who normally love each other get into some nasty arguments and sometimes friendships cease to exist over wall posts or comments.
There is no reason to deny here my warrior spirit. I am argumentative and fight for the light! Haha how very Joan of Arc of me. Very often I find myself so shocked by what people have said or posted that I retort from a place of anger on my own page. I tend to go back in forth, not only online but in my daily life, between undying compassionate love for every single human and, utter disbelief and disgust at what some humans are capable of doing to each other and our planet Earth. It can get reeeeal hazy in my world when those two get mixed in together. The thing is, though, that I am aware of the fact that what we need is love rather than judgment in order to evolve and especially to heal the ills that have been accumulating here for a very long time. In the moments of shock, it can be hard to put love at the forefront.
The reason I write this post right now is to make a pledge. I am much more likely to remember it if I have shared it with someone, even an audience I may never meet, and it is important to me that I keep my word - so no forgetting! My pledge is that from now on, everything I post on Facebook will come from a place of love. Even if I write about something icky going on in the world, I will write it informatively but without judging those who may be participating in it. Ultimately, judgment is knowing something is awry and being attached to that fact or attaching an emotion to it, whereas discernment is simply having the knowledge that some random thing is imbalanced.
Recognizing judgment vs. discernment can be extremely difficult to do, and takes a ton of practice. I am saying this from first hand experience. However discernment allows the observer to work constructively toward a remedy. More often than not, judgment keeps the observer stagnant in a state of sometimes paralyzing emotion about the situation. There are of course times when people are prompted to take important actions because they are so angry about something, and this is well channeled anger.
I haven't quite figured out how I would for instance, inform my friends about something as horrific as factory farming without being aggressive and judgmental against everyone who supports it in some way, but I am actively practicing it. Perhaps my love for the animals and for the people who perform this type of work will outweigh my repulsion by the fact that it happens, and that will give me some creativity in my approach to talking about it AND changing it.
Lemons to Lemonade, right?!
There is a strong feeling that a particular coworker of mine is going to give me lots of first hand practice in compassion, which is a big reason I feel this person has been placed in my life. Now I can look forward to the challenges s/he presents, because I know they are going to help me in many other aspects of my life. I love how I just turned that lemon into lemonade!
Ok, it's late, so that's enough for now.
Ciao!
Money Mindset
oh man today i had a mini meltdown over a parking ticket. not just the parking ticket, but a bunch of other money stuff that's been going on lately. first of all, not having any. being a cycle of poverty for all of my life, except for one year, (but even then still thinking i was in a scarcity situation) - that shit kinda hit the fan for me today.
i've worked on my money issues. each time i think i've made some dramatic discovery about their existence, i soon fall back into the cycle, somehow disabled from putting my new discoveries into sustainable practice…it's fear, i know...and slowly, i realize that the money issue in my life could very well be a thousand layers deep…and i'm just peeling them away one by one. man i really hope that's not the case, i'm ready to learn the lessons and get over this broke ass money hurdle i keep 'trying' to jump but for some reason never quite make it.
we had a little mini adventure downtown, which i recommend for anyone who is saving some dough for something awesome but needs to get a little fun in, too. using the paypal mobile app, we have been able on 2 occasions now, to redeem coupons at cool places for food, coffee, cupcakes, gifts, even gourmet balsamic vinegar. it's awesome.
but today was different. it was frustrating from the start. we set off on our quest for free stuff, and encountered several problems. we did get the most awesome free range organic blackened chicken salad i've ever had, for free. and a couple of decaf soy lattes, for free. pineapple balsamic vinegar, free. cool right? well, after walking all over downtown for the free stuff, we get back to the car to discover we've gotten a parking ticket for being 20 minutes too late. it cost just about what we would have paid for our adventure.
it literally brought me to tears.
here's why. i felt like we were trying so hard not to use money, and we found a cool way to have some fun without spending any, but it backfired with the ticket. i'm sure the fact that the whole day had a tinge of frustration didn't make it any better. but once i dried the tears from my face and held the others back (it was really difficult but i couldn't really explain why i was crying, so i had to stop), i sat there in the car, thinking about what has been going on in my life.
then a lightbulb went on that i kinda wanted to turn off because it meant i would have to change something (something else! holy shit i've been going through this growth spurt and changing all sorts of things for years! can i get a break?!!) but you really can't deny things like this. my mindset has been to search for free or low-cost without sacrificing quality - but what i should be thinking if i really want to turn my life around is 'i want to be able to comfortably afford the things i want to do."
i've been very lucky in life. people have been generous to me, people have helped me with my business, they've flown me across the country, they've given me money so i could have 6 weeks off to enjoy myself - all because they believe in me. sometimes i'm not quite sure i deserve it, but i have to remind myself that if i didn't have something positive to offer the world, i wouldn't be so cared for. once i even found a grand on the sidewalk. that was nuts…talk about a universal handout!
now though, i'm a grown ass woman and it's time for me to start earning my keep - and the only way i'm going to do that is if i start motivating and focusing not on how i can get things the cheapest or for free, but rather on what i can do to bring a good cash flow into my life so that i can support the crafters, cooks, and coops that i believe are making a positive mark on the world. i am no longer meant to survive by the graces of people who love me, but of my own accord. i don't need a lot, but it's time to be self sufficient in every possible way.
so there you have it, and so do i. if i want to be able to support a local business who makes the best salad in town and has good ethics too, it's time for me to put my big girl pants on and use the gifts i've been given to make money and do good deeds with it.
end of story!
end note: i am not by any means suggesting that there is something wrong with frugality. in fact i think it is a tremendously beneficial quality. however, i am suggesting that intention has a lot to do with what we get. if we focus always on having less, we will continue to have less. if we focus on being abundant, we will have abundance.
i've worked on my money issues. each time i think i've made some dramatic discovery about their existence, i soon fall back into the cycle, somehow disabled from putting my new discoveries into sustainable practice…it's fear, i know...and slowly, i realize that the money issue in my life could very well be a thousand layers deep…and i'm just peeling them away one by one. man i really hope that's not the case, i'm ready to learn the lessons and get over this broke ass money hurdle i keep 'trying' to jump but for some reason never quite make it.
we had a little mini adventure downtown, which i recommend for anyone who is saving some dough for something awesome but needs to get a little fun in, too. using the paypal mobile app, we have been able on 2 occasions now, to redeem coupons at cool places for food, coffee, cupcakes, gifts, even gourmet balsamic vinegar. it's awesome.
but today was different. it was frustrating from the start. we set off on our quest for free stuff, and encountered several problems. we did get the most awesome free range organic blackened chicken salad i've ever had, for free. and a couple of decaf soy lattes, for free. pineapple balsamic vinegar, free. cool right? well, after walking all over downtown for the free stuff, we get back to the car to discover we've gotten a parking ticket for being 20 minutes too late. it cost just about what we would have paid for our adventure.
it literally brought me to tears.
here's why. i felt like we were trying so hard not to use money, and we found a cool way to have some fun without spending any, but it backfired with the ticket. i'm sure the fact that the whole day had a tinge of frustration didn't make it any better. but once i dried the tears from my face and held the others back (it was really difficult but i couldn't really explain why i was crying, so i had to stop), i sat there in the car, thinking about what has been going on in my life.
then a lightbulb went on that i kinda wanted to turn off because it meant i would have to change something (something else! holy shit i've been going through this growth spurt and changing all sorts of things for years! can i get a break?!!) but you really can't deny things like this. my mindset has been to search for free or low-cost without sacrificing quality - but what i should be thinking if i really want to turn my life around is 'i want to be able to comfortably afford the things i want to do."
i've been very lucky in life. people have been generous to me, people have helped me with my business, they've flown me across the country, they've given me money so i could have 6 weeks off to enjoy myself - all because they believe in me. sometimes i'm not quite sure i deserve it, but i have to remind myself that if i didn't have something positive to offer the world, i wouldn't be so cared for. once i even found a grand on the sidewalk. that was nuts…talk about a universal handout!
now though, i'm a grown ass woman and it's time for me to start earning my keep - and the only way i'm going to do that is if i start motivating and focusing not on how i can get things the cheapest or for free, but rather on what i can do to bring a good cash flow into my life so that i can support the crafters, cooks, and coops that i believe are making a positive mark on the world. i am no longer meant to survive by the graces of people who love me, but of my own accord. i don't need a lot, but it's time to be self sufficient in every possible way.
so there you have it, and so do i. if i want to be able to support a local business who makes the best salad in town and has good ethics too, it's time for me to put my big girl pants on and use the gifts i've been given to make money and do good deeds with it.
end of story!
end note: i am not by any means suggesting that there is something wrong with frugality. in fact i think it is a tremendously beneficial quality. however, i am suggesting that intention has a lot to do with what we get. if we focus always on having less, we will continue to have less. if we focus on being abundant, we will have abundance.
Getting the MOST from Your Citrus
I love Lifehacker.com. It's a great web-source for all things to make your life better. Whether that means simpler (work smarter not harder), more organized, deep/meaningful, etc... Lifehacker probably has an article for everyone. Today, I stumbled upon a group of posts all about our beloved citrus fruits.
They're all pretty similar but I thought I'd provide them all for fun anyway. Enjoy!
They're all pretty similar but I thought I'd provide them all for fun anyway. Enjoy!
Living with your In-Laws
Now here is a post of the utmost relevance. My husband and I are currently living with his parents. Yep, that's right. We're in our 30's, at the beginning of our second year of marriage, and several months ago embarked on another gypsy journey which landed us in Austin, Texas. We didn't plan to stay here, we were actually headed for Virginia where we thought we would live with my mom and step dad for a few months until we set up shop.
Well as it happened, we kinda decided Austin is the place for us to be for a while. It's an awesome town, but I'll get into all that jazz in some future post. The point of this one is that we are living with my husband's mom and dad, his grandma, his younger sister and her husband, and his youngest brother. Yep, there are 8 adults living in a house together, living our separate yet intermingled lives, and doing it pretty well considering all the obvious things one would consider when pondering such a situation.
It's not always pretty, it's not always comfortable, and sometimes it can be annoying (due to a certain news channel my father in law likes - I hope he doesn't get mad if he reads this). I'm not sure I can remember the meaning of privacy, but we've learned to cope with it. Before a few days ago we hadn't slept in a room with a door since August. But despite all the implied circumstances that come with being newlyweds living with the parents and the rest, each of us living together is doing a really great job at going with the flow.
Well as it happened, we kinda decided Austin is the place for us to be for a while. It's an awesome town, but I'll get into all that jazz in some future post. The point of this one is that we are living with my husband's mom and dad, his grandma, his younger sister and her husband, and his youngest brother. Yep, there are 8 adults living in a house together, living our separate yet intermingled lives, and doing it pretty well considering all the obvious things one would consider when pondering such a situation.
It's not always pretty, it's not always comfortable, and sometimes it can be annoying (due to a certain news channel my father in law likes - I hope he doesn't get mad if he reads this). I'm not sure I can remember the meaning of privacy, but we've learned to cope with it. Before a few days ago we hadn't slept in a room with a door since August. But despite all the implied circumstances that come with being newlyweds living with the parents and the rest, each of us living together is doing a really great job at going with the flow.
The Traffic Affliction
If you're anything like me, sitting in traffic must be one of the worst situations for your well being. I hope for you that this is not the case for your life, but I know it is an affliction for millions of people. And what I mean by a traffic affliction is that your blood pressure rises, your anxiety and fear increase to astronomic levels, and you develop an angry rage at every person who gets in your lane or gets to an exit before you, and even at those brazen drivers who risk it all to drive in the shoulder lane!
The sad thing about the traffic affliction is that all of our measurable physical and mental reactions to being stuck in traffic are a result of our perception. The way we think about the situation (and not the situation itself) has ignited the fight or flight response in our brain and endocrine system, and we have on some level begun to equate the consequences of traffic to being chased by a large predatory prehistoric mammal.
Our hormones go into overdrive, signally to every part of our body that we are at risk of death, causing the ego to become angry at everything standing in our way of survival. This has a really terrible effect on the body and not to mention the emotional and mental parts of our being, and I believe if we don't learn very quickly how to resolve the traffic affliction is this lifetime, we are bound to many lifetimes of learning to eradicate our egoic road rage!
The sad thing about the traffic affliction is that all of our measurable physical and mental reactions to being stuck in traffic are a result of our perception. The way we think about the situation (and not the situation itself) has ignited the fight or flight response in our brain and endocrine system, and we have on some level begun to equate the consequences of traffic to being chased by a large predatory prehistoric mammal.
Our hormones go into overdrive, signally to every part of our body that we are at risk of death, causing the ego to become angry at everything standing in our way of survival. This has a really terrible effect on the body and not to mention the emotional and mental parts of our being, and I believe if we don't learn very quickly how to resolve the traffic affliction is this lifetime, we are bound to many lifetimes of learning to eradicate our egoic road rage!
Lemon Infused Olive Oil
Infused oils make a great base for dressings, marinades, casseroles,
sautes, and baking recipes. Oils infused with citrus peels, however,
make an excellent polish bursting with scent for wooden furniture,
cutting boards, and toys. Ever thought of making your own salt or sugar
scrubs? Use this lemon infused oil for an energizing addition. Recipes
of this sort to come...
Before you make this oil, you'll want to check out the article Juicing Lemons the Right Way so that you've got plenty of peels to work with.
Making the Infused Oil
What you'll need:
Glass pint or quart sized mason jars with lids
Organic Extra Virgin Olive Oil (I get it at Costco)
Kitchen shears or a good knife
Before you make this oil, you'll want to check out the article Juicing Lemons the Right Way so that you've got plenty of peels to work with.
Making the Infused Oil
What you'll need:
Glass pint or quart sized mason jars with lids
Organic Extra Virgin Olive Oil (I get it at Costco)
Kitchen shears or a good knife
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